Brush Up

I have had THE hardest time trying to get Toby to brush his teeth...He has so many problems with them, I'm just so frusterated..

I always scoffed at the 'gum wipes' that they have for babies. My mom kept saying she didn't start brushing our teeth regularly til we were over a year. We started running a brush around Toby's mouth every few days and letting him hold it and chew a bit. Then we started doing it before naps and bed time to get used to doing it before sleep, and I let him 'brush' my teeth while I did his..

Then I started to notice his front teeth discolouring. I thought to myself that it was some food stuck in them a figured I'd get it out with the tooth brushing. Then I kept noticing it.
Then i tried scratching it off with my finger nail and realized that it was actually an indentation, not stuck-on food.

Then I panicked.

We have a naturopath-like dental hygienist and when I freaked out to her about Toby's teeth she said it didn't look all that bad and that things like that can happen with kids and that it seems like he has high acidity in his mouth (which I have) and so leftover food eats away faster.
She gave me a clay powder mix to put on his teeth and said to just keep and eye on it.

That was a year ago.

Now his teeth have grown and for every millimeter longer they get, there's now more room to decay.
They clay was working for a while... his teeth didn't look so stained and it didn't seem to be spreading. But little by little it seemed to get worse. There's no way to stop something like that, just slow it down I guess.
We started letting him brush his own teeth in a mirror as long as I got to finish.
That didn't work after a few nights.
So then I had to do a once-over and he was allowed to 'finish'.
But he just spends 15 minutes complaining about how he wants to do it and not me.
So then for a while it worked if Grampa brushed and Mommy put the clay on.
Then he started to reject the clay.
So then we stopped doing that daily and just tried getting him used to brushing.
But now his teeth hurt so much he fights will all he's got to not brush his teeth.
I've enlisted the help of songs and puppets.
Which worked for a week.
And now the novelty's worn off.

Tonight, what should have taken 30 seconds, took over 15 minutes.
He sits on his stool with  his head between his knees and just moans.
I asked him why he didn't like brushing his teeth.
He said it hurt.
I asked him to show me where it hurt.
He pointed to his throat.
I said that keeping his teeth clean would keep the germs from making his throat sore and that I hoped he wasn't getting sick.
He told me not to say that.
I asked if his mouth hurt.
He said it tickled.
I said if he just kept his mouth open and not tried to wiggle so much then the brush wouldn't keep catching on his mouth.
He put his head between his knees again and pretended not to hear me.

I've resorted to scraping plaque off his teeth with my thumbnail or a toothpick.

We're going to try to get an appointment for him again and he'll probably need major dental surgery.
I wanted to avoid that cause these teeth are going to fall out anyway, but if they rot out then his adult teeth will be messed up, and if he's in pain, the next two years are only going to get worse.

*le sigh*

*end rant*
*bed time*