(K)needing

Dear Toby,
Please stop kneading my boobs when you are trying to fall asleep. It's enough that you nurse for 45 minutes to fall asleep, I don't need the added annoyance or pain, thank you very much. At least let me cut your nails so it doesn't feel like you're ripping holes through my nipple when you squeeze.
Sincerely, your over-tired mother.

deer mom,
Im not trying to hurt yew I just haf a reely hard time falling a sleep and need to do something with my hands. I no yew try to give me other things but its not the saem as yew. Im trying to get better at sleeping but i get woreed about yew leeving so i dont want to let go.
love Toby

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Dear Toby,
I really don't enjoy being yelled at when I do exactly what you just asked me to do. Whining and being rude are not acceptable ways of talking to me. I'm trying to make you happy and I"m trying to help but I don't know what to do if you don't tell me what you need.
From, your non-mind-reader mother.

deer mom,
wen i yell its usually because i'm trying reely hard to come up with the right word but sometimes i forget what things are called, even if its something we do evry day. sometimes i will agree to things because i think its a good idea, but it doesnt meen i want to do it right now. sometimes i will ask for one food but be thinking of something else and i get confused when yew bring something difrent. i try to use my words and yew have helped me alot to lern them but i still dont know them all. there is alot going on in my hed.
love Toby

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Dear Toby,
You need to learn to play by yourself so that I can get some work done. I don't need to sit and watch you play cars for two hours when you are just playing by yourself anyway. Me leaving the room doesn't mean I'm abandoning you. Just relax please.
From, your way-behind-her-work mother

deer mom,
i do like playing by myself and am getting more used to it but i like it when yew watch me play. i try to bring yew things to look at but its not the saem as when yew are sitting there. i don't get why you need to sew all the time. the sewing masheene is cool but not THAT cool. i just dont like when you leeve in the middle of me showing yew a good trik with the cars.
love Toby

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Dear Toby,
Washing your hair will not kill you. Just let me do it quickly and then it will be done.
from your exasperated mother

deer mom,
i dont like the feeling of the water dripping on my hed. hair washing takes away from play time. cant you wash my hair wile i'm having a nap?
love Toby

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Dear Toby,
Why do you choose the most miserable days to go outside? When it's sunny I want to go out. When there's a blizzard or a thunderstorm, I do not.
Sincerely, your vitamin D deficient mother

deer mom,
wen its sunny outside it means the upstairs living room is warm and id rather watch tv on a warm couch than go outside. wen it's raining there are puddles and when its snowing there is endless snow to dig. i remember it being reely cold out and how am i suposed to no if one day is warmer than the next?
love Toby